Friday, August 24, 2007

Five Finger Fridays: V.4.0

You knows the drill. Wal-Mart customers gots the itchy fingers. Hat tip to Anonymous from last Friday for the title "Five Finger Fridays." Me likey.

This week's list is a bit short. I was dead tired by the time I left, and we were so busy I really didn't get a good chance to catalog all the theft.

-- a two-pack of silicone bra inserts
-- a bottle of Aquafina (consumed in store)
-- and El Movimiento CD
-- a two-pack of Sharpie pens
-- a set of Crayola markers
-- four pairs of sunglasses (tags for all four found in the ladies room)
-- a $3.68 bag of chicken tenders from the deli (found empty in a shopping cart)
-- a child's Sippy Cup
-- a box of acne medication
-- a set of Maybelline lip pencils and and eye shadow (maybe they bought it, maybe they're going to hell!)
-- a box of the Britney Spears perfume
-- a Hector El Father CD
-- a Vicks Vap-o-Rub inhaler
-- a package of chlorine tabs for either a pool or an aquarium (I didn't get a good look at the box)
-- a pair of size 8&189; athletic shoes (found the old pair in the box)
-- half a bag of peanut M&Ms


kdl said...

What do you think: that it's easier to shoplift at WalMart due to its size and (some) employee ennui, therefore people steal ridiculous things? Or do these shoplifters also practice their art at chi-chi boutiques. I mean, stealing Maybelline -- that just makes me sad.

Clark said...

But Maybelliene could go for some decent money when they sell it at the swap meet.

Anonymous said...

I wonder if Wal*Mart's recent "we aren't calling the cops if its <$20" has also increased shoplifting?

Josh Matthews said...

I like to think these were all taken by a single teen determined to throw the most bitchin' party since Sam Donaldson threw one when his parents were out of town and everyone came, but they totally trashed the place before the cops came and then his parents mad him change schools. Man, that would be so boss!

Wait, do kids still say "bitchin'"?

Krystle said...

A bag of M&M's!? Really!? You couldn't just shell out the what, $.75?

I love these lists though. They're hilarious.


FARfetched said...

I'm surprised you haven't found empty beer/wine bottles stuffed in odd places. And you call yourself a ghetto Wal-Mart? :-)

GrecoRoman said...

Where are all these Wal-Marts that sell alcohol? They sure aren't in my part of MD or southern DE...

FARfetched said...

The WMs on Planet Georgia sell the beverages of choice.... Odd that MD/DE wouldn't.

High-Maintenance & Hostile Heidi said...

(maybe they bought it, maybe they're going to hell!)

Omigod. You are a genius. How on earth do you come up with these hilarious "bitchin'" phrases?

Missy said...

If I was desperate, I would steal sharpies.