Thursday, March 01, 2007

Is that the price I see before me

It never ceases to amaze me the absolute lengths that human beings will go to in pursuit of self-delusion, stupidity and pure mean-spiritedness -- all in order to save a frelling buck.

I had a woman completely blow up at me Sunday afternoon -- over the matter of a two dollars and change on a roasted chicken because she thought that the time written on the package (the out of the oven time, so customers know the chicken was fresh) was the price.

Really. This woman brings the label for a roasted chicken up to the Customer Service desk and launches into a huge spiel.

"I don't like how every time I come here I get overcharged for something. Look at this. Look at it. This chicken was supposed to be $2.30 and it rang up at $4.98. LOOK AT IT. Why are things always a mess in here."

Finally I get the label and the recept from her.

ME: "Ma'am. See here? That 2:30 is written in the TIME bar on the label. That is what time the chickens were put out." In her defense, it was written 2 3 o and could literally have meant anything. But it was clearly in the TIME space on the label. And there was nothing that said PRICE anywhere on there.
HER: "Well, that's not what I thought it meant."
ME: "Ma'am, what did you think it meant?"
HER: "I thought it was the price. I saw them putting all these chickens on a stand and thought that they were going to mark them down because they were old. That's the only reason I bought it. I thought it was yesterday's chicken and it was a good deal."
ME: "Ma'am, I know exactly what you're talking about -- and that's just a display for fresh merchandise. That's why they put the time the chickens were taken out of the oven on the slip."
HER: "Well, I think it is the price."
ME: "Ma'am, it's not the price. It doesn't have a dollar sign in front of it. Your receipt says you checked out at 3:30 p.m. So these were fresh chickens."
HER: "Well, I don't think that's right. I think they were markdowns."
ME: "Ma'am, do you want to go over there with me and check?"
HER: "OK."

So off we go over to deli. The rack is just a warming rack. There is actually not a price point anywhere on there. So I suppose I should have give her the bleeping bird for $2.30. But I didn't. Stupidity should not be rewarded.

I was like "Ma'am, see. There's no sign that says markdown or reduced. All these chickens have 430 on them, because they were put out at 4:3o p.m.

HER: "Well, I still think that was a markdown chicken. I don't like this. I don't like this at all."
ME: "Ma'am, do you want to return the chicken?"
HER: "No. We already ate it. I just don't think I should have to pay $4.98 for it."

So she drove back to the Wal-Mart for $2.68 on an already consumed piece of merchandise. Her gas cost more than that.


Anonymous said...

"We already ate it"...holy fucking shit!

That killing would be justifiable!

ChazB said...

That killing would be justifiable!

Justifiable? I'd consider it a mercy killing. People that stupid shouldn't be allowed to reproduce for the betterment of humanity.

Off topic...greets from Eastern Canada. The weather is colder but the idiots are just as dumb.

MavenofMoxie said...

OMFG!!! She cannot be serious. WHERE can you buy a fully-cooked rotisseire chicken for $2.30???? Wait, that much reasoning is beyond her.

Someone please, track down this woman, sterilize her NOW. Why would you drive back for $2.68 when a gallon of gas on the low end in the nation right now is $2.30? No sense! No sense! No sense!

That theivin' ho knew it wasn't an entire warm, marked down chicken for $2.30. Whenever you go past a warming rack like that in any grocery store, it's damn obvious they're fucking fresh!

Anonymous said...

On the other hand, who would want to eat an old chicken??? Nevermind, dumb question.

It would actually be considered a favor to humanity to actually sell an old chicken to her to clean the gene pool.

Astonished said...

$4.98 for a cooked chicken? Dead cheap.

There are no Wal-Marts where I live, and I think cooked chickens cost between $6.99 and $8.99 here, more if you go to a specialty market.

Anonymous said...

How do you not simply reach out and strangle these people? You have infinite willpower ...

grundes said...

On the other hand, she did bring a receipt, which makes her a model customer!

FARfetched said...

Well done — the punch line ("we already ate it") was delivered perfectly!

Too bad you have to live it...

yellowdog granny said...

I would have told her where to stuff her chicken...I could never do your job...

yellowdog granny said...

as bad as I hate to bring up my state at this time...we do have a great expressing...'he needs killing'...or in this case...'she needs killing'..

Anonymous said...

You stepped out from behind the counter? Now your just making things up. NO WAY you walked her over to the deli. No way.

You don't have to lie to write a good blog, so don't.

"In her defence..."? She must have been white. You would have never cut the "ghetto" folk any slack. You've really been showing your racisism as of late.


Debo Blue said...

I come here as much for the commentary by your visitors as your posts.

Anonymous said...

Yellowdog granny...there are several states who use the "killing" statement.

It needs to be directed towards one particular asshole who randomly shows up to taunt our blog God!

Anonymous said...

Sometimes I think you must be making this shit up but I went into our ghetto wal-mart last week to check if they still had the nazi tshirts so I could take a pic for Consumerist. I looked around at the filthy human flotsam pushing germ-encrusted shopping carts and decided you maybe aren't making this shit up.

I am not Star Jones said...

It's too bad that people like this woman aren't forced to wear a sign that says

I look well adjusted but there IS something truly wrong with me.

Anonymous said...

I sell some stuff on ebay and people try to return things for reasons that don't even hold a light to what you go through. People are nuts