Wednesday, August 23, 2006

The things that get returned

Sunday was just one of those brutal, 150-customer days. There really wasn't a lot of drama. Not too much screaming. We did get some really odd things returned though.

  • two empty milk jugs (because the milk was sour) Uh-huh.
  • a package of frozen carrots - because they were "slimy"
  • vanilla-scented candles, which she swapped for mulberry
  • three "defective" ceiling fans (they just didn't know how to put them up)
  • seven curtain poles (at the same time) and the man argued with me because he couldn't multiply and thought that seven curtain poles at $7.08 apiece somehow magically added up to $65. Um, no.
  • enough school supplies to fill two buggies, all with the excuse "He/She doesn't need them."
  • everything you need for a Dora the Explorer birthday party, including paper plates, cup, hats, party favors and games. More than 40 items on four receipts plus another 10 with no receipt.
  • a bag of frozen shrimp
  • a box of Benadryl (which makes the register print out a warning to return the item to the Pharmacy at once, because it has pseudoephedrine in it, which is used to make meth).
  • at least a half-dozen air mattresses
  • four used vacuum cleaners
  • a huge stereo system, because the CD tray won't open
  • $140 worth of sheets, all at once
  • a light bulb
  • two magazine that the old woman had obviously read, then returned
  • a $22 book that was allegedly a "gift" but had never left the store - it was a gift alright - from Wal-Mart right to this scamming cow
  • enough ladies fashion to outfit a trailer park - none of it defective, and most of it obviously too small for the people buying it! Wishful thinking won't get you into that size 6 girls - laying off the snacky cake will!
  • File under Vendor Refund - Saturday's newspaper, because the idiot didn't notice that the newspaper vendor hadn't come yet and he paid $1.50 for YESTERDAY'S newspaper.
  • two paper shredders (the ones we sell at Wal-Mart are total junk)
  • a kid's bicycle, because the TIRE was flat. Umm, why you feel that qualifies you to return said bicycle is beyond me. The kid probably rode over a nail. Fix the flat and move on!
  • two pair of thongs - this from a woman who was pushing 70 - Granny has MOVES!

    But no real excitement. Just another day of taking back the stuff people don't want and have been convinced by the mass media that they need before sanity once again takes over and they return the crap.

    kamikasee said...

    I can't imagine returning food. Maybe soup or something non-perishable, but not carrots. I do have to say, though, that those baby carrots do get slimy after they've been in the fridge for a week or so. I think they're still okay to eat, but it's kind of gross.

    Winston said...

    I've taken back a ceiling fan because I learned that the room we wanted it in wasn't blocked for one and it wouldn't have held without some extra work from yours truly. I should have cheked the ceiling first, but we were in a new house and in a rush and thought the builder blocked the room for one. They can't be trusted and we can't be expected to make good choices ;) At least it was unopened.

    Anonymous said...

    Fabulous... I love all your blog entries!!!

    Anonymous said...

    When I worked at the desk at walmart I had someone return a USED PREGNANCY TEST w/o receipt. She said it didn't give her the answer she wanted!!!! Manager ok'ed the return, cash back,...RIDICULOUS!